Why am I single, the question I hate and
get ask the most; "Where is the boyfriend?", "You are so pretty, how come
you're still single?", "How
is it that you don't have a boyfriend?". I
usually answer just with a smile and not say anything as I really don't owe
anyone an answer. Is not even a joke that I get this asked all the time I
can say at least once or twice a week. Yes, I am a twenty-one-year-old woman living life single in 2017, someone tell me what exactly
is wrong with that?
I want to write an answer to this to
finally get all the thoughts out of my head. I use to feel insecure about it
growing up, in my late teens I wondered if there was something wrong with me.
Everyone around me seem to me already be in long term relationships, having
babies, or getting married, and I was at home wanting to feel a part of that.
It took me time to understand myself and what being single meant to me to
become happy and confident in it like I am today. I am single one can say it can be because of
trusting issues, or having high expectations, or being a hopeless romantic, or
avoiding and friend-zoning any guy who comes near, which in truth is a little
bit of everything but it is mostly because I
want to be!
I am single, not because no one is
interested, or because I am not worthy, or because I am not good looking or all
the crazy things that "qualify" a single person according to society.
There are people out there who are always in relationships, whether that is
jumping from one to another or staying in one for a long time they can't seem
to be single. I know that there is societal pressure on those people to but somehow
that is more accepting than someone being single because they want to be. I am
single because I want to be. It makes absolute no sense to tell someone that
they don't fit certain criteria that at the end is a social construct that is
not real. If I am pretty, I have to be in a relationship? I have
to be pursing somewhat of success to make up for not being in a relationship? Is there an age limit
to where is no longer okay for me not to be in a relationship? It really makes no sense.
I enjoy being single. As a person there is still much room for me to grow, I am working on myself every day and I get to discover more of who I am. I also don't have time, my priorities at the moment have me in a busy schedule because of how well I know myself I can't afford to date at the moment and I am okay with that. Now, just because I am happy living the single life that doesn't mean I am closed to the idea of love. On the contrary, one of the reasons I am single is because I am in love with love. I am a hopeless romantic, I believe that the love of my life is somewhere out there and that one day we will meet. I am not closed off to the idea of a relationship at this point on my life either, if the right person where to come into my life, as hectic as my life can be, that person is going to make it better and not make it feel like a burden. I am not looking for it, if it comes then it comes meanwhile I am going to make the most of being single.
With Valentine's Day coming around, I see
all the lovey couples going out their way to make the day special which I know
can be slightly annoying to singles out there but it shouldn't have to be. If
it doesn't bother you the rest of the year being single this day shouldn't
either. Treat yourself but yourself and buy some chocolate or whatever you
want, don't feel weird or strange about it there is absolutely nothing wrong
with a confident person defying societal rules. It’s 2017, don’t go with the
flow of everything going wrong with the world, be yourself, love yourself, be
happy.
With love,
